I Will Never Be Good...and That's Not Bad

Tim Jackson, 2/27/13:

So...the GOP is "gonna wreck" the spending cuts? Or maybe the sequester itself?

Does that make any sense at all? Or did Jackson just get so caught up in his metaphor that he forgot Ralph was the hero of that movie?

Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk

Ed Gamble, 2/27/13:

And the third whammy is...businesses want customers?

That's a whammy?

I think Ed lost sight of his plans midway through today's cartoon, that's what I think.

Over Macho Grande

Scott Stantis, 2/27/13:

The sequester is a life-saving mechanism which needs to be triggered -- it won't happen automatically and it wasn't specifically designed, two years ago, to do maximum damage to the priorities of both major American political parties in order to force them to make the deal that they subsequently failed to do.

In other news, it recently rained on the sun.

The Cycle of Stupid

Ed Hall, 2/26/13:

If only there were some kind of alternative to a society of people all commuting individually in inefficient automobiles -- some kind of mass transit to move large numbers of people at once!

Sadly, such a thing is only a dream.

You Gonna Take That From HIM?

Bob Gorrell, 2/26/13:

Actually, over the past four years, federal spending is as close to flat as it's ever been. Sure, there were two big wars, an unfunded Medicaid expansion, and the bailout of the entire financial sector before that -- but, even there, the big problem was the massive drop in revenue (from a certain president's tax cuts in 2001 and 2002) that drove up those deficits.

But let's not let the facts get in the way of a cartoon or anything....

The Great Red-Carpet-ivator

Henry Payne, 2/25/13:

Daniel Day-Lewis never drops character.

Either that, or Lincoln has had some bad experiences with theaters in the past....

Those Three Dirty Words

Bob Gorrell, 2/25/13:

Governments should obtain funds through some other means than taxation -- perhaps piracy? -- and just sit on those funds, without using them to do anything.

Thus, the ideal government is Smaug.

Slightly Unattractive People ARE Evil!

Lisa Benson, 2/23/13:

California needs more money to cover its responsibilities -- so, logically, it must need to raise taxes.

A bold statement for Benson!

Pry the Chardonnay from His Cold, Dead Hands

Mike Lester, 2/22/13:

Any form of restrictions on private gun ownership -- for example, of fully automatic weapons -- will immediately lead to the complete outlawing of guns and then to an huge criminal boom as citizens make "bathtub Uzis" and go to speakeasy gun ranges.

And, since fully automatic weapons have been tightly regulated since 1934, this all happened three generations ago.

Not Even Touching the Dark-Skinned Snake Charmer Imagery

Michael Ramirez, 2/22/13:

As we all know from basic economics, when you reduce demand for a particular good (say, for example, crude oil), by providing alternatives (such as solar power), then the price will automatically go...up?

Anyone want to buy Ramirez a used copy of Wealth of Nations so he can bone up?

The Subtle Homoeroticism of Wrestling

Chuck Asay, 2/22/13:

Everyone else's go-to sport to complain about the IOC was rhythmic gymnastics -- which, we must admit, is hand-selected as both easily mockable and perfect for cartooning -- but Asay, always the rebel, prefers to complain about the existence of badminton, or perhaps tennis, which have the disadvantage of being real competitive sports that lots of people like and know how to play.

He also does it about a week after everyone else, but this kind of greatness just cannot be rushed!

Lowering the Boom Times

John Cole, 2/22/13:

Gosh, maybe we should have invested in some high-speed rail and alternative fuel technologies when we had time, shouldn't we?

Oh, That TEA Must Be Bitter Indeed

Clay Bennett, 2/21/13:

When there's no actual media stories that you feel like cartooning about, there's always the other option: just draw something defaming your usual political punching bag, call it a day, and hit the links.

Now He's Not Saying They're All Savages, But....

Chuck Asay, 2/20/13:

There are so many murders among African-Americans because they are all godless heathens.

Here, let me pull out the important chart for you:

In case you can't read the tiny type, the ethnic group with the highest rate of reported church attendance was "Non-Hispanic Black."

Hm. Must be something else killing all of those people....

He's Shoveling SOMETHING, All Right

Terry Wise, 2/20/13:

Global warming means it's never cold anywhere ever again!

Where We're Going, We Won't Need....

Scott Stantis, 2/20/13:

Stantis would be happy to live without roads, police, firefighters, the military, clean food & water, and Chicago's mass-transit system -- just try him!

Once again, the right-wingers are straight-out calling for anarchy.

Price Controls Now!

Lisa Benson, 2/19/13:

Increased demand for a good in limited supply -- for example, from increased economic activity -- will lead to a price rise for that good until demand is suppressed enough to match supply.

Why does Benson hate the free market so very, very much?

The Person That Turns Over the Most Rocks Wins the Game

Rob Smith, Jr., 2/16/13:

There is a crisis, but Smith won't tell you any more than that it exists.

But, boy howdy, it's a Big Red Crisis!

Not Wind Like a Watch, But Wind Like the Air

Chuck Asay, 2/15/13:

It's an unconscionable travesty that honest, hard-working rate-payers have to pay money for electricity generated by wind, when electricity generated from burning coal and oil is utterly free!

No, wait....

Some People Think They Can Outsmart Me

Kerry Waghorn, 2/15/13:

The newest playable character in Team Fortress 2: Secretary of State John Kerry!

No, seriously -- what else could the stack of hats mean?

What This Country Needs Is a MAXIMUM Wage

Gary Varvel, 2/15/13:

I assume that Varvel and his fellow newsroom staff at the Indianapolis Star are voluntarily cutting their wages to the federal minimum in order to save jobs, strengthen the economy, and decrease poverty and government dependency, right?

Because what kind of hypocrite would cartoon something like this under any other circumstances?

The Worst Thing About the Government Is That It Exists

Jerry Holbert, 2/14/13:

Ah! For the dream of a government that doesn't take in any revenue or spend any money!

What do we call that again"

Oh, yes -- anarchy.

Please Help -- Can Only Afford One Bullet

Steve Breen, 2/14/13:

Oh, no! The biggest military in the world might actually get slightly smaller -- but still much larger than any two or three other countries put together -- when two wars end!

How horrible!

The Slipperiest Slope of All

Terry Wise, 2/14/13:

I'm not entirely sure but...I think this is a pro-drunk driving cartoon.

Props to Wise for picking the really unpopular side, I guess. He'll need something to prop up that diaphanous unspecified-things-will-get-worse-somehow excuse for an argument he's got going on here.

Oh, and that woman is out of a Harlan Ellison story -- she has no mouth and wants to scream!

Upon This Rock

Glenn McCoy, 2/13/13:

The very most important piece of Catholic doctrine -- far above "love thy neighbor as thyself," vastly superior to "judge not, lest thee not be judged" -- is "never ever let a company pay for anyone's birth control."

And thus Obama is the most anti-Catholic president ever.