Nov 29, 2013

They Only Let Him Drink Water, Too

Clay Bennett, 11/28/13:
Every other political stripe -- from the Spartacist League to the John Birch Society -- is made up of sane, reasonable, thoughtful adults, and only the Tea Party is a collective child, to be exiled to the kitchen.

Nov 28, 2013

The Famous "Punk Rock" Global Warming Forum, No Less

A.F. Branco, 11/27/13:
Global warming means it's never cold anywhere, ever again!

Seems to Be Missing a Label or Two

Steve Artley, 11/27/13:
Entirely because of our socialist, secretly Kenyan, secretly gay, secretly Martian President, turkeys need to be killed before they can be eaten.

Thanks, Obama!

Plymouth Rock Landed on HIM!

Lisa Benson, 11/27/13:
The Pilgrims -- who landed two hundred miles off course from the English settlements around Jamestown, showing they probably could have used a "navigator" -- had a death toll of nearly half of the colony (45 of 102 colonists) over the first winter, implying that their health care was not all it could be (particularly on the nutrition side).

Benson might not be alluding to either of those facts here, but I'm not sure what she is saying: that Obamacare is complicated? That it stretches back in time to 1620? That we all hate pudgy bureaucrats with briefcases?

Nov 27, 2013

Check Out the Perspective on That Firing Squad!

Chip Bok, 11/25/13:
Obama is doing something so horribly illegal that Bok doesn't even need to tell us what it is.

And that thing is....?

Nov 25, 2013

Oh, Those Halcyon Days of Youth! Where Have They Gone?

David Horsey, 11/22/13:
In case you were wondering if there was anything the Boomers couldn't make about them and their oh-so-special psyches, the answer is a resounding No.

Even the death of a president is only important because it made them so very, very sad.

We Got Some Flyin' To Do

Tim Hartman, 11/22/13:
The rules of the Senate are defined forever in some section of the Constitution that the cartoonist was too lazy to look up, and are definitely not just controlled by a simple vote of the majority of the Senate, having been changed a number of times, most recently in 1975.

No, definitely not the latter. No fair checking actual facts!

Nov 22, 2013

It's Horrible When Things Cost Money

Ed Gamble, 11/21/13:
A government is a poor and limited thing, and can only do one thing at a time -- it's either a Mars probe or Obamacare. (Or, presumably, the interstate system, or the military, or Social Security, or Medicare, or the FDA, or or or.)

Those of us who remember the days when the federal government could launch two wars and a major new entitlement (Medicare Part D) without breaking a sweat -- let alone a two-front global war plus dragging ourselves out of the Depression -- wonder when Americans got so lame and wimpy.

Nov 21, 2013

Bet He Can't Afford a "Really Good" Car, Either!

Ed Gamble, 11/20/13:
Just so I get this straight: Gamble's complaint about the Obamacare "navigators" is that they're honest, reasonable people who don't promise or give undeserved benefits, but push people who want something they can't afford to find ways to increase their income?

I think he needs to read his right-wing briefing papers a little more carefully next time: Obamacare navigators are supposed to be identity-stealing escaped felons who rival ACORN in fostering theft, larceny, and deceit.

Not Arguing For What He Thinks He Is

John R. Rose, 11/20/13:
It's true: Obama should have picked a national health-care system proven to work well for millions of citizens at lower cost than the current U.S. system.

...such as any one of the various forms of single-payer already extensively tested and proved by countries as different as Switzerland, Denmark, Australia, Canada, and the UK.

Nov 20, 2013

A Single Death Is a Tragedy, a Million Deaths Is a Statistic

Rob Rogers, 11/18/13:
Every thing with three initials is directly comparable to every other thing with three initials, no matter what.

Or, perhaps, Rogers is demanding an eternal flame for every single American ever shot by a gun, which would be a lot of fire.

Nov 18, 2013

The Horrible Spectre of Good Cheer

Gustavo Rodriguez, 11/16/13:
Hearing a commercial for an event slightly further in the future than you expect is horrifying!

Also, you are old and cranky and those neighbor kids are on your lawn again.

Those Women Must Be Horrible Sluts -- They Slept With HIM!

A.F. Branco, 11/15/13:
As we all know, the leading cause of pregnancy is birth control.

Thank god for the courageous Republicans trying to save us all from health care -- if only we didn't have insurance, we'd all live forever!

Nov 14, 2013

Spinning, Slowly, Slowly, in the Wind

Eric Allie, 11/12/13:
The greatest thing in politics is watching the other guys try to explain when they screwed something up really badly.

(As far as I can tell, the real explanation is that Obama promised something he could never deliver -- insurance companies drop hundreds of thousands of people every year, and change plans all the time, so we all should have expected that would continue -- but he's too "Presidential" to simply admit that honestly. Of course, expecting a politician to admit that he has no power over something is a fool's errand.)

What's Good For Tulsa Is Good For America

Bruce Plante, 11/13/13:
Because big mergers are always good news for the employees of the affected firms -- there's never any redundancy leading to layoffs, and no "rationalizing" of disparate contracts to drive down labor costs.

Nope, mergers are a great thing for workers! (Or do I mean "top management"?)

(Plante is probably following the lead of his fine city's mayor, Dewey Bartlett, in praising this deal, which might bring a few more jobs to his city...by taking them from elsewhere in the US.)

Nov 13, 2013

Can't Fit Through the Kitchen Door

Ken Catalino, 11/12/13:
Chris Christie is fat. Fat! FAT!!!!

Get it? GET IT?

'Cause you'll be getting cartoons exactly this lame for months on end if he does end up running for president. (And for years if he wins.)

When The Only Tool You Have Is A Hammer

Jeff Stahler, 11/12/13:
We can trace a single extreme weather event directly to larger patterns of climate change.

Oops, sorry, that's we can't trace a single extreme weather event directly to larger patterns of climate change. Our apologies.

High-Speed Rail Cartoon or Minimum-Wage Cartoon? You Decide!

Lisa Benson, 11/12/13:
Yes, Poverty is an Airstream trailer parked on the tracks of the Train to Nowhere, which is also the Cost of Living.

Um, what?

Nov 11, 2013

The Man With the Star

Terry Wise, 11/10/13:
I'm not sure if this is a slam at Obama for being so out-of-touch that he doesn't get that a "dog and pony" show is meant to be a performance (albeit a lame, dull one) by those animals, or if the whole thing is a dog whistle that I don't recognize. (I'm trying to bring it into focus as an attack on the Obamacare website, but I can't figure that out.)

Also, you can gauge Wise and his target audience's age quite precisely by his cultural references.

Indoctrinate Them Early, Folks!

Milt Priggee, 11/8/13:
Because "Tea Baggers" are strongly against both the current military and rose-tinted traditional images of the American past, and those are what "honoring veterans" really means.

The Tea Party, as we all know, is a strongly anti-military movement, which attacks veterans as baby-killers and wants to unilaterally disarm the USA. (Oh, wait, no -- that's the New Left of the 1960s, though many Tea Party folks may well have been New Left in their youth.)

Lastly, who's on food stamps, anyway -- the veterans or the"Tea Baggers"?

When George Washington Talks, People Listen

Jimmy Margulies, 11/8/13:
Money has more followers on Twitter? Does money tweet often?

(I'm sure this is supposed to be a comment on the Twitter IPO, but it's mixing up the service Twitter provides and the valuation of the ownership of Twitter, which have very little to do with each other.)

Nov 7, 2013

A Yellow Machine Is Falling Apart, Somewhere

V.C. Rogers, 11/6/13:
Um...what?

I'm hoping that this depicts some kind of famous statue near wherever Rogers cartoons, because otherwise I have no clue.

Nov 4, 2013

Let Them Drink Brine

Signe Wilkinson, 11/3/13:
Everyone living less than four feet above sea level is massively wealthy, because we all know that the rich, who have their choice of living arrangements, prefer to live where they will be regularly flooded.

We can see this globally, as well -- the people living in rice paddies, along flood-prone rivers, and in other low-lying areas are always the richest people around, and the hillsides and mountain-tops are reserved for the poor.

Will Obamacare Cover Blue Balls, Too?

Darryl Barksdale, 11/1/13:
Men are pure and virginal creatures until marriage, without a thought of sex in their minds.

It's utterly impossible that one of those paragons would ever get someone pregnant!

Nov 3, 2013

Note that the Author of this Blog Drives a $15k Honda Fit

Henry Payne, 11/3/13:
As we all know, the extensive US government regulation on cars -- driven by consumer-safety concerns, just like health care, and now extending to myriad details of seat belts, crumple zones, air bags, and child seats, among much else -- has made cars completely unaffordable to most Americans.

There's just no such thing as an inexpensive car that complies with safety regulations! You always have to choose between safety and price, silly!

Nov 1, 2013

You Owe Me Restitution!

Randy Bish, 10/31/13:
Yes, health care is the very worst gift you could ever receive -- refuse all treatment now, like the Koch brothers urge you to!