Red In Tooth and Claw

Terry Wise, 3/10/12:

The poor are like predators: if you feed them, they'll get fat and unable to go out and kill for their own sustenance.

But if you don't feed them, conversely, they will kill and eat you.

(I'm not sure this metaphor makes the case Wise wants it to.)

Climbing Out of a Strip-Mine

Lisa Benson, 3/11/12:

No energy source other than fossil fuels has ever been, or will ever be, any good for anyone, anywhere in the world.

We just need to drill aggressively everywhere until the oil runs out, and then hope the Underpants Gnomes will save us.

He's Coming For Your Daughters!

Eric Allie, 3/8/12:

Preventative medical care is only needed by the weak. Strong Americans can will pain and illness away, which is why we don't need any defined health-care coverage at all.

Also, note the suggestive linkage of a black man, the word "date," and contraceptives -- c'mon, Allie doesn't need to connect all the dots for you, does he?

The Horror, The Horror

Dick Locher, 3/8/12:

So..."city taxes" used to be in the suburbs, and are now heading upriver away from them?

Does that make any sense at all?

Fool Me Once, Shame On You, Fool Me Repeatedly For Years....

Chuck Asay, 3/8/12:

No, really! Obama's going to seize your guns any day now! His utter failure to do anything even remotely resembling that for more than three years is a mere smokescreen! Take to the hills and raise the cry of rebellion!

Money Is Speech

Lisa Benson, 3/8/12:

It is possible that Benson is not entirely comfortable with the place that money is playing in the current Republican primaries.

We shall see if her tune changes when those giant wads of cash are diverted into ads attacking Obama in a few months.

Our Second Superman Cartoon Of the Day -- Collect Them All!

Glenn McCoy, 3/7/12:

So Conservatives are the phone booth in which Mild-Mannered Mitt changes into Super Romney, but the phone receiver of dog whistles gets wrapped around his leg, and so will drag him down?

(Am I getting the metaphor right?)

You know, I'm not sure, but this just might be a comment on how running that far to the right will hurt Romney in the general election. But that's the last position I'd expect from righty stalwart McCoy, so I'm probably wrong.

Someone Doth Protest Too Much

Mike Lester, 3/7/12:

"Oh yeah!? Well, all those other guys called her a slut and a whore, too!"

"Um, no, they didn't, actually."

"Well, they said other things! Things I won't bother to specify! But they're much, much nastier than Rush is! Really! I'm being oppressed for being a white man here!"

Echoes With the Sounds of Salesmen

Milt Priggee, 3/7/12:

You might have missed it -- since it got no news coverage -- but Rush Limbaugh said some nasty things about a Georgetown Law student over the weekend.

Clearly, the coverage of that event was terribly easy to miss.

Those Are Some Impressive Shoulder Pads

Clay Jones, 3/5/12:

All taxpayers get back exactly as much from government as they put into it -- that's why, for example, only people with school-aged children pay for schools, and why my home state of New Jersey gets back 61 cents for every dollar we send to Washington, while Jones's Virginia gets $1.51.

Pandering to the Base

Joel Pett, 3/7/12:

Yup. That's roughly how right-wing our current President is -- fair to middling, in Bush I territory and much less lefty than even Nixon or Eisenhower.

Then remember that the current crop of Republicans uniformly consider that "socialist." And consider your support, O man holding up a "Liberals" sign.

Congress Shall Make No Law Mandating Women's Footwear, Either

Michael Ramirez, 3/7/12:

One of the most hallowed tenets of the Constitution is the inalienable right of corporations to refuse to pay for anything they don't want to, and anyone who disputes this is a filthy Communist.

Secretly a Mild-Mannered President!

Bruce Plante, 3/7/12:

Either Obama just did something particularly wimpy in non-campaign mode (and I missed it), or Plante realized he was overdue for the obligatory "I hate the current President" cartoon.

I'm going to tentatively claim that this is about Obama not threatening to nuke Iran off the face of the Earth, unless someone wants to argue otherwise.

Assuming Conservatives Will Pay For Anything? Hah!

Adam Zyglis, 3/6/12:

Zyglis cartoons in black and white specifically so that you can't call him a racist today.

A Bowl of Band-Aids Is the Same as Hospitalization Care, Right?

Rick McKee, 3/6/12:

1) McKee is, of course, conflating condoms and contraceptive pills here, which ignores the fact that contraceptive pills have other uses...and that was one of the major points of this entire exercise.

2) So are we in favor of Planned Parenthood now? Because it was a different story a couple of months ago....

Time For Another Head-Pat

Dana Summers, 3/6/12:

Women! Am I right? Always worrying their pretty little empty heads about the wrong things. Why, I don't know why we ever gave them the vote, since they always just waste it!

Running Up That Hill

Bob Englehart, 3/5/12:

Really! Really! Everything is Bush's fault, and will continue to be Bush's fault until at least November, unless Obama needs it to be Boehner's fault for a while.

Twin Cadillac Valentine

Signe Wilkinson, 3/5/12:

If Mitt Romney had, just once in his life, done anything as crazy and ballsy as this, he wouldn't have the lack-of-enthusiasm problem he has now.

On other other hand, can't you totally see Newt Gingrich doing this on the slightest provocation?

Your Guess Is As Good As Mine

Ann Cleaves, 3/2/12:

How do we make who listen to us about what?

And, once we've figured that out, can I ask why?

My Health Insurance Covers Gas, But Not THAT Kind

Nate Beeler, 3/4/12:

News flash! Right-wingers now want to give the President the unilateral power to set prices!

No, really -- how else would a President directly affect the price of gas now?

It Hits Obama, Therefore It Is a Good Stick

Mike Lester, 3/4/12:

Note that this cartoon is dated today. Lester is possibly the only person in the entire free world -- since Rush Limbaugh has already apologized for saying the same thing -- out at the end of this particular tree branch.

And also note that the young woman in question testified 1) about a friend and fellow student, not herself, who 2) needed oral contraceptives (i.e., "the Pill") to control a real medical condition, and the lack of same caused her to lose an ovary.

At some point, you just have to say: "Mike Lester, are you really this much of an asshole? Really?"

Update:
And there's also this gem from Gary McCoy, the day before (3/3/12):

McCoy has a slight problem distinguishing between "government," on the one hand, and "private insurance," on the other. Perhaps the USA can institute a single-payer plan so that he, and those with similar problems, can be right for once?

And remember the essential lesson: any woman who wants to have sex is a whore, because only whores have sex. Good girls don't even know sex exists.

Socialist Presidents Set All Prices Directly, Right?

Eric Allie, 2/29/12:

Allie doesn't seem to have noticed that it's 2012 now.

Of course, we all knew that -- I'm just surprised; I thought he thought it was still 1951!

So What Would Be the BJ Equivalent in This Metaphor?

V.C. Rogers, 2/29/12:

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm very sad to present: the worst metaphor ever!

(That amendment, by the way, is one banning gay marriage and any possible precursors, like civil unions.)

Eyedropper of the Beholder

Bob Gorrell, 2/29/12:

The US is one of the biggest oil producing nations in the world. We actually export a lot of oil -- and may even become a net exporter in the near future.

In fact, our production is notably up in the Obama years.

By the Light of the Gigiantic Orange Moon

Paul Fell, 2/29/12:

Now, now! If there had only been more guns in that particular lunchroom -- say, if every single student had been packing heat, as I'm sure some Internet commentators are wishing even now -- then you would have seen a real firefight!

So, whatever you think of the "gun culture," remember that it could have been worse....