Showing posts with label A.F. Branco. Show all posts
Showing posts with label A.F. Branco. Show all posts
Nov 18, 2013
Those Women Must Be Horrible Sluts -- They Slept With HIM!
A.F. Branco, 11/15/13:
As we all know, the leading cause of pregnancy is birth control.
Thank god for the courageous Republicans trying to save us all from health care -- if only we didn't have insurance, we'd all live forever!
Thank god for the courageous Republicans trying to save us all from health care -- if only we didn't have insurance, we'd all live forever!
Oct 25, 2013
Always Pack Your Own
A.F. Branco, 10/24/13:
Health care is so important that any thing that delays or stops Americans from getting it is an immediate, horrible problem.
Unless that's forty-some-odd votes against the parachute, of course.
Unless that's forty-some-odd votes against the parachute, of course.
Oct 18, 2013
Does ANYONE Ever Look Good in a Branco Cartoon?
A.F. Branco, 10/17/13:
Because if there's anything Americans love more than losers, it's loudmouth guys who talk about all of the big things they're going to do before they quietly fold their hands and slink out the back door.
Americans usually love that, so it's hard to see why they're not celebrating this time.
Americans usually love that, so it's hard to see why they're not celebrating this time.
Oct 16, 2013
It's Getting Colder These Days, so Global Warming CAN'T Be True!
A.F. Branco, 10/15/13:
As long as you define "global warming" in the correct manner -- as in, "it's hotter every single day than any prior reference" -- this statement is absolutely true. And nearly 3% of climate scientists would agree with it!
Branco is a master of goalpost setting.
Branco is a master of goalpost setting.
Oct 2, 2013
ENTITLED To Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness? As IF!
A.F. Branco, 10/1/13:
People get soft and weak when they rely too much on the government for paved roads and clean water and being safe in our homes and having fire-fighters and the whole "rule of law" thing.
Anarchy now!
Anarchy now!
Oct 1, 2013
Global Warming Means It's Never Going to Be Cold Anywhere Ever Again
A.F. Branco, 9/30/13:
Some time in the indefinite future, it will be cold somewhere where it is usually hot, for some unspecified reason.
Based on that unsupported claim, we can prove that it will never be hot anytime in between, nor that there will be any other changes to the climate, because things always stay the same, period.
Based on that unsupported claim, we can prove that it will never be hot anytime in between, nor that there will be any other changes to the climate, because things always stay the same, period.
Sep 20, 2013
Why Do We Have to MAKE LAWS, Anyway?!
A.F. Branco, 9/19/13:
Every law or ruling vaguely on the same subject is exactly the same as all the rest of the laws on the same subject.
This is why the tax code of today is exactly the same as the 1940s top rate of 90%, and why the government budget is precisely the same today as it ever was, and why all laws are exactly the same in every state and town in the country.
Or, just maybe, Branco is talking out of his ass here.
This is why the tax code of today is exactly the same as the 1940s top rate of 90%, and why the government budget is precisely the same today as it ever was, and why all laws are exactly the same in every state and town in the country.
Or, just maybe, Branco is talking out of his ass here.
Sep 9, 2013
Not to Mention a Pretty Creepy View of Sexuality
A.F. Branco, 9/6/13:
Any Republican -- even the oldest, most respected and mature statesman in the Senate -- who agree with Obama on anything, ever, is nothing better than an empty-headed teenage girl.
Let's see, that's sexist, ageist in both directions, and nearly Maoist in its hatred and fear of ideological deviation. I do believe we have bingo.
Let's see, that's sexist, ageist in both directions, and nearly Maoist in its hatred and fear of ideological deviation. I do believe we have bingo.
Aug 16, 2013
"Prophet" -- Nudge! Nudge! Get It?
A.F. Branco, 9/15/13:
Every other President -- for example, that useless empty suit Reagan, who barely had enough brain cells to walk in a straight line -- is perfectly fine to insult.
There's absolutely no history of taking the elected leader of our country seriously -- at least not when he's a black guy.
There's absolutely no history of taking the elected leader of our country seriously -- at least not when he's a black guy.
Aug 14, 2013
And the Gas Tank Is in the Driver's Seat
A.F. Branco, 8/13/13:
When Obama calls on Republicans to stand behind his major policy initiatives, they just say "Yes, sir" and fall in line...
BWAA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!
I'm sorry; I just can't say that with a straight face. If this is what Branco considers acquiescence, I have to assume his idea of action is armed insurgency.
BWAA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!
I'm sorry; I just can't say that with a straight face. If this is what Branco considers acquiescence, I have to assume his idea of action is armed insurgency.
Aug 6, 2013
Note the Circa 1980 Punk Mohawk on a Kid Born Circa 1990
A.F. Branco, 8/5/13:
All of the unemployed are feckless Millennials -- and they're all completely qualified for those great "skills gap" jobs that are going begging now; they just stay unemployed out of spite!
Pay no attention to the facts and studies by so-called "experts" showing that the big problem is long-term unemployed (i.e., people actively looking for work for tens of weeks) and that older workers have born the worst of the recession and weak recovery.
Nope -- just blame it on those damn kinds, like always!
Pay no attention to the facts and studies by so-called "experts" showing that the big problem is long-term unemployed (i.e., people actively looking for work for tens of weeks) and that older workers have born the worst of the recession and weak recovery.
Nope -- just blame it on those damn kinds, like always!
Aug 2, 2013
Beast Master
A.F. Branco, 8/1/13:
Um, so Obama has harnessed the combined power of Democrats and Republicans to forge a single all-powerful government, and only Ted Cruz can stop it from reaching the land of Freedom -- which is marked by a flag of The Will of the People?
I'm impressed -- I don't think there's a single thing in this cartoon that makes sense or bears any resemblance to reality.
I'm impressed -- I don't think there's a single thing in this cartoon that makes sense or bears any resemblance to reality.
Jul 25, 2013
Look for the Robber Baron Label
A.F. Branco, 7/24/13:
Remember: the fact that white (mostly Republican) men ran the Big Three automakers into a hole for thirty years, and that highway spending and tax breaks allowed businesses and families (mostly white) to move out of Detroit into outer suburbs had nothing to do with its decline.
Nope, it's all about those uppity poor people wanting to get paid for their work.
Nope, it's all about those uppity poor people wanting to get paid for their work.
Jul 23, 2013
I Know You Are But What Am I?
A.F. Branco, 7/22/13:
Branco is determined to out-right-wing any other cartoonist out there, even if he has to shoehorn a half-dozen unrelated ideas into a stale idea.
Please, he cries, won't some Koch brother bankroll me!
Please, he cries, won't some Koch brother bankroll me!
Jul 22, 2013
Note That "Commie" Is The Worst Insult Branco Can Think Of
A.F. Branco, 7/19/13:
Eric Holder is a dirty Commie because he wants to see an upstanding white man punished for nothing more than stalking and killing a black teenager.
Luckily, we live in a society where that's totally legal!
Luckily, we live in a society where that's totally legal!
Jul 18, 2013
Fear of a Hoodied Planet
A.F. Branco, 7/17/13:
Multiple Choice!
A) "If only there were some other way of defending myself instead of shooting someone dead! But, sadly, such a thing just does not exist! Perhaps if I had studied MMA, or if I were substantially taller and heavier than this teenager, I would have some other options!"
B) "Perhaps if I really believe this person is dangerous, I should listen to the police dispatcher whom I just talked to!"
C) "Hey, whad'ya know -- people don't like it when you stalk them in your car and demand to know what they're doing! Sometimes they react badly! Maybe I should apologize, give up, and let this guy go!"
A) "If only there were some other way of defending myself instead of shooting someone dead! But, sadly, such a thing just does not exist! Perhaps if I had studied MMA, or if I were substantially taller and heavier than this teenager, I would have some other options!"
B) "Perhaps if I really believe this person is dangerous, I should listen to the police dispatcher whom I just talked to!"
C) "Hey, whad'ya know -- people don't like it when you stalk them in your car and demand to know what they're doing! Sometimes they react badly! Maybe I should apologize, give up, and let this guy go!"
Jul 17, 2013
Afraid of the Dark?
A.F. Branco, 7/16/13:
"...of course, you did kill an innocent teenager, who was only in danger because you chased him for no good reason, and you'll have to live with that for the rest of your miserable life."
How sad. He killed someone, and there might be consequences! That's not supposed to happen when you knock off a black kid!
How sad. He killed someone, and there might be consequences! That's not supposed to happen when you knock off a black kid!
Jul 15, 2013
Be Careful -- That Gas Is Getting Really Expensive!
A.F. Branco, 7/12/13:
"Racial tension," of course, has nothing to do with laws that essentially let white guys stalk and kill black teenagers and get away with it -- it's entirely caused by the media.
'Cause black people wouldn't know about those things if they didn't see it on the TV, right?
'Cause black people wouldn't know about those things if they didn't see it on the TV, right?
Jul 12, 2013
Igor Is Confused
A.F. Branco, 7/10/13:
If one kind of murder rate is high, then logically we cannot ever give any attention to any other kind of murder -- for example, since police officers are only killed rarely, we will now never care about any other police deaths.
Also, Branco seems to be advocating for some kind of larger solution to stop inner-city violence -- perhaps some strong nationwide laws to stop the kind of handguns that cause most of those deaths, perhaps?
Also, Branco seems to be advocating for some kind of larger solution to stop inner-city violence -- perhaps some strong nationwide laws to stop the kind of handguns that cause most of those deaths, perhaps?
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